One of my biggest struggles that I face as a Christian is watching others not reach their full potential in Christ. I realize that it is God who transforms, but I also know that He gives us all free will to choose and truly put our trust in Him. I often wonder how pastors must feel when they get up week after week, spilling there hearts out for a congregation to “hear” and open their hearts in surrender to God. I think it would drive me crazy; I know it would, b/c just watching it from the pew every week is agonizing. I know I’ve blogged about this allot, and sometimes I feel like I’m going in circles with it; finding peace, then getting pushed out again by a wave of frustration. Bottom line I know is that just like salvation, our hearts have to be open to the voice of God, and we have to get to a point where we finally let go and trust. I know for me, it’s been a very painful process of surrender and pruning, but man the fruit and the growth it produced and continues to produce. Yesterday, I was at home and rather frustrated over this and other stuff God is getting me to deal with; and He gently reminded me that the best thing I can do with all this frustration is to turn it over to Him in prayer. He said “Robin, I know this drives you crazy, it drives me crazy too, but you know you can’t make these people change, Pastor Jim can’t make these people change, but one of the most powerful things you can do to help them is to pray, I know you do, but when you feel like you are going in circles with it again, and it’s driving you crazy, hand it over to me in prayer and know that I’m dealing with it.” Surrender it,yes. I just needed to be reminded. I so desperately want to see people transformed, I often forget that I can’t see what God is doing in their lives, but when I pray, it is a way of surrendering my trust that God is dealing with it, and that He has me working on my own issues. It’s hard, and I know God knows that it’s hard for me, b/c my heart cares deeply for others. I’ve seen how truly living surrendered has radically changed me, and it’s really hard not to judge others, but with God’s help daily, I just need to surrender and trust that He is working where I can’t see. Some daysI am really grateful for being such a mess. I know that sounds weird, but I guess it keeps me humble and human, and probably keeps my pride in check. So Lord, right here, right now, I surrender others that you have place in my life to you, I am trusting that you are working in their lives even when I can’t see the transformation for myself. Help to keep me humble and help me to not forget these very important things that you teach me. It is your grace, your unmerited favor that we need daily. Thank you for giving us eyes to see your truth, ears to hear your voice, and hearts to long for your truth and your ways and to desire to become more like you. I believe God, help me with my unbelief. Amen.